The Unfaithful Bride?

The pastorate can be one of the most frustrating, and yet also rewarding vocations. If you were to survey the pastors you know, most if not all, would say that they would never choose to be a pastor, but only put up with the unique demands and frustrations of pastoral ministry because of God’s call on their life.

One of the chief frustrations for many pastors is inconsistent attendance by church members for Sunday morning worship. According to Barna, “47% of American adults attend church in a typical weekend, not including a special event such as a wedding or a funeral. (2005)” Also research indicates, that “58% of protestants,” and “55% of Catholics” attend a worship service each weekend. This information suggests that just over half of all “Christians” (I know that term is a can of worms in and of itself) in the U.S. attend worship on a given weekend. Below is just a short laundry list of reasons why members at my churches were inconsistent:

· Traveling for family vacations
· Youth athletic games (#1 culprit – soccer)
· Family reunions
· Hunting
· “ I don’t have to go to church to be a Christian”
· Personal Theology (i.e. My personal salvation is not dependent on the church)
· My commitment is to the Lord, not the church

I could go on, but you get the point. The most frustrating point for me was my most committed church members always seemed unfazed by the inconsistency of their brothers and sisters in Christ – the lack of commitment. In fact, often they (committed members) would often make excuses for their (inconsistent members) absences. I can hear it now, “Relax pastor don’t take it so seriously! Don’t make it personal! They’re not rejecting you!”

The problem with most churches (the people, not the architecture) is their own self-image or identity. Most Americans see church as something you do. It is just one more thing you write into your calendar, and it is easily erased if something better comes along. As a result, we choose Sundays to travel, catch up on rest or schedule family reunions – because it is just something we do!

But if we think ecclesiologically and theologically how can I and “they” not take it (the lack of commitment) personal? Most church members fail to realize that they are not rejecting the pastor, nor the church service, but actually them – “true church.” Throughout Scripture the most profound metaphor used to describe the church is that of a “bride.” Matrimonial covenant language has been used throughout Christendom and scripture to describe the relationship between Christ and his Church and also between church members.

Now the radical individualist might argue that his undying commitment is to Christ (the groom). However, the bride metaphor is clear; it is not the “part” but the “whole” that forms the bride. We must remember the exhortation of Paul, “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church (not the individual) and gave himself up for her. (Eph. 5:25)” Our relationship with God although personal, has always been corporate in nature.

So, is it just a coincidence that nearly 55% of all Christian marriages end in divorce? How can we be faithful to our spouse when we can’t be faithful to Christ and his bride or vise versa?